the invisible yesterdays

trudging through a forest of people

we wade through a sea of faces

all the people we've met

all the people we've been

the people who talked in awkward pauses

and the people who chattered endlessly

the people who fought so hard they cried

and the people who laughed after every fight

the people who stole nervous glance at each other

and the people who couldn't stop staring

the people who loved each other

and the people who loved some more

but now they are all strangers

in a world of sepia yesterdays

we are what we are today

two lovers holding hands together

Pic by Basu.

flying away :)

she was the kite

yellow and orange
and green and blue
she smiled and she cooed
she soared and she flew

she was happy and free
not a wrinkle on her brow
but she was held by a thread
why didn't it show?

i held her and she knew
i would hold her fast
and she could wander
but never get lost

 This was written in response to a friend's status update on fb. The update was about Coldplay's song : Paradise.

A harmless question

Would you love me even if I hated you?

What kind of question is this?

A hypothetical one.

I can see that. What I want to know is where it came from.

From my mind.

Full points for being a smart Alec. But zero for clarity.

Can't you just answer the question? Without asking a hundred in return?

And could you refrain from asking questions that don't make sense at all?

It's a simple yes/no question.

No, it isn't. I know that whatever I answer, you have an interpretation ready in some corner of your mind.

So how does that obviate the question?

It doesn't. But it does render it moot.

But that doesn't mean you can't answer it.

I will not add fuel to whatever stupid fire you've lit in that little devil's workshop of yours.

C'mon, be a sport!

Fine! Yes, I would!

If you would, why would I ever hate you?


:colon dee:

lost and found

all the lost prayers

where do they go

filed somewhere

as a record

of rejected applications?

gathering dust

faded with age

there's a prayer

long lost

no hope fueling it

making it soar

what's a butterfly

without its wings

i think the heart

it holds them

close to itself

long after the brain

abandons them

and when we die

it's not old age

that kills us

but it's just

the heart filling up

of these prayers

long lost and dead

-------

Pic by Basu. It's the opposite to all that this poem is about. It's hope. For all prayers.

The bubble burst

he sits there

tear-streaked cheeks

bleary eyed

staring at the place

where the white of the bedsheet

meets the white of the walls

voices have kept him awake

a strange cacophony

lulling him to sleep

only to snatch him from

the edge of the land of dreams

long has he sat and moped

blurring the lines between

words that were actually uttered

and ones he conjured up himself

his is a state of eerie nightmares

that stay for the day

she was here yesterday

and she's gone now

a strand of hair

on a tear-soaked pillow

is all that remains

he should remember

all the fights they had

and yet he remembers

the smile she smiled

and the tears she cried

it's morning now and

the light creeps up to him

touching his toes

he looks on, startled

straining to remember

the night that has been

-------------------

Photo by Basu. Those are my hands in the pic :). Had to burst about 20 of them before he got the perfect shot.

round the mulberry bush

every morning and every evening

the sun and the moon, they

stand at their doorsteps and

with a wistful look in their eyes

resigned to a fate of

eternal damned separation

and two moments of love

in a twenty-four-hour day

----------------

क्या कहते होंगे चाँद और सूरज

जब दिन/रात भर के बाद

एक दूसरे को देखते होंगे?

दिन/रात का सिरा थामे

कब से घूम रहे साथ

जाने कब होंगे पूरे

हमारे फेरे सात

------------------

 

कितने दूर, कितने पास

 

 

 

We were too busy
In our I's
The 'us' that could be
Would never be seen
With closed eyes

Each one standing
With an outstretched arm
Hoping the other
Would take the first step
And so here we are
Standing orphaned
On our islands

And there are the words
Useless ones we threw around
All the beautiful ones
We threw away
An ugly beautiful cacophony
That now flows between us

So we stand here
A mere shout away
With dried up voices...

 

-------------------

 

Photo by Basu. It is the opposite of all that this poem talks of. And yet it somehow fits :)

Point-of-no-return

How can I be sure that I am in love - the love people keep talking about, the love I had always wished I would stay away from??

Let’s discuss the symptoms you have. We’ll make the diagnosis later.

I keep having these dreams of her. I try but they just won't go away.

But this has happened to you for so many other girls. A passing infatuation - a crush as it is called - would have the same effect.

I love talking to her, or rather - listening to her.

This could be true for so many other people - members of both sexes. It could easily happen with people who share their interests and passions with you. You don't fall in love with every person you love to talk to.

There are times when I suddenly remember an incident involving the two of us. And it invariably brings a smile to me.

What’s the big deal here? Look, she's your friend, we aren't debating that. It’s but obvious that you'll remember the happy times you've spent with your friend and this memory will obviously lift your spirits.

I can't watch any romantic movie without imagining the two of us in place of the protagonists in the film.

Now, that's what we call an overdose of this genre of movies. Remember Pavlov and his dog?? You’ve been similarly conditioned by all those flicks you've watched all your life. You have a chat with a girl and the next logical step for you is a dinner and then dates. And then the two of you end up spending the rest of your life happily ever after. Bullshit!
 
No other girl interests me these days.
 
Oh! So you are monogamous?? Now there must have been something that attracted you to this particular girl in the first place. This something must have been a factor differentiating her from the rest of the crowd. So while you're stuck on this one quality of hers, there's a slim chance that you'll like anyone else. But it still doesn't prove that 
You’re in love with her.
 
But she's so beautiful.
 
There you go. It was this superficial attraction from the beginning, wasn't it??
 
It isn't only her beauty that I like in her. She has many other qualities.
 
Of course she has. So have many others - and you know that.
 
But I can't imagine spending the rest of my life with anyone else. And I know this didn't happen for anyone else. I want her to be with me forever. I don't care if I don't talk to her, or don't see her - only if someone can assure me that this hiatus would lead to an everlasting continuity.
 
Why, then you are surely, madly, deeply in love. 

Shit!!!

water and she

she comes in
after a shower
shakes her head
and the droplets fly
bends her neck
and towels her hair
and i see the drops
leaving her hair

it's raining
she has a paper boat
she takes care
while letting it go
in the stream
takes care
not to touch the water
but she's all wet
in the rain

she sits by the river
her feet in the water
and talks to me
a calmness takes her over
maybe the water
drains all the anxieties away

she splashes water
onto her face
and it's hid behind
tiny rivulets
but they run off
and she opens her eyes
her eyelashes are wet
she looks at me
and i know
i have the world

it's raining
and she puts her hand
out of the window
closes her eyes and lets
the raindrops falling on her palm
be the only sensation
and i look at
serenity personified

her eyes are brimming
but i forbid her to cry
she's allowed
just one drop
it rolls down her cheek
and i hold it in my palm
all the sea
wouldn't have felt heavier

ps: 1, 2  and 4 are common scenes
3 is from swades
5 is from the song boondon se baatein
6 is from spanglish

-Pic is by Basu. I thought the silhouettes of their hands formed a nice small house.

two blips on a radar

one:
she stood in the sands, her feet barely wet. the waves looked intimidating and she was afraid to take another step forward. he saw her standing thus and understood what was going in her mind. he rested his chin on her shoulder, held her in an embrace and whispered in her ear: "if i promise to be your anchor, if i promise to protect you from every wave that threatens to wash you away, if i ask you to trust the love i have for you, would you still be afraid of these stupid waves??" she walked with him into the sea, almost in a trance.
it was the most beautiful day of her life.
 
two:
"what exactly is it that you would have me do?"
"just one thing. walk out of my life."
he was stunned.
"are you sure? not out of your room or house, but out of your life??"
"yes, yes, yes. out of my life."
"okay. whatever you say. but this won't stop me from loving you."
and he walked out.
it was the ugliest day of her life.